September 4th

Finally went through a “bad day” with Jay. Bad yes. Horrible? Hardly. He handles his mental health issues better than me. Hell even the day I went to go get waxed I spiraled but oddly enough Jay called me and pulled me right out of that darkness. It got really dark for a moment but was gone when inheard his voice. No one has been able to push me that quickly from the darkness before. 

I think it has more to do with the depth of my love for him as opposed to it just being Jay and his voice. I’ve never never loved anyone like this. It’s amazing how hard and fast I fell for him again. I know I loved him before but I was also terrified. I was so young and been hurt so much that I couldn’t fully understand what I felt for Jay then or how much my feeling for him would change me, completely.