Dec 30

I feel like my heart just has a mind of its own. I’m trying to calm down. Trying to not overthink and stress. Honestly. But my brain just doesn’t shut off. It just keeps going. 

Jay and I are doing better. I think he’s more worried about me than I’m worried about me. Which is hard to imagine but here we are. We went to one of his meetings today. My brain is so out of it that listening to their stories or share did nothing. Nothing is penetrating into my brain now. Although I think Emma said she hadn’t had dick in 3 years caught my attention 😂 girl same. It was horrible. But now I have this handsome man who put his head between my legs every morning. May not get sex daily but I can guarantee that at least at 95%  

Work. Gah that’s stressing me a bit. Not too much. It is a state job.