August 16th

I’m not sure when I became so physically dependent on Jason but the only time I sleep well is when I’m sleeping next to him. Not only sleeping next to him but touching him in some way. Even if it’s just back to back. Knowing he’s next to me. Feeling him. I feel safe and protected. So I dread nights now when I’m without him. Like tonight. But then I’ll be with him until next Wednesday. So almost a full week starting Thursday. 

So it’s tonight… I’m at my house, I can’t even say I’m home anymore. I miss him… seriously. Sleeping next to him… I’ve never felt more safe. Now I just feel alone, unprotected. But next to him? I sleep so easily. I’m not sure I can do this until next April… or May. I want to be with him now. It’s only been 2 months… Yes I’m being impatient and I’m over there all the time anyways. Fuck its hot.