Why is it so hard to sleep? I crave sleep but can’t fall asleep. Usually by now. You’d be here beside me. Cpap on…
Today was just a hard fucking day over all. I still can’t wash our sheets. I’ve gone through all of your clothes here but I can’t touch your shoes.
I’m going to get a tattoo today. Your signature plus our wedding date and our coordinates… so it’s not your name which I know you were slightly opposed to but it is still.
I miss you so much. So many times I think I have to tell Allan… and then I remember. Or I watch something and think send it to Allan…
I really hope you are up there. Looking out for me. I mean I know you know I can take care of myself. Like I always told you. I don’t need you. I want you. That’s more important. We relied on each other but could stand on our own.
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