June 29th

He asked me how long we’ve been together last night. I was unsure I heard him so I asked him to repeat it. Lol he just said you heard me 🙄😂 Ass. Less than a month. Almost one month depending on when we’re starting the count… The day I messaged him or the hotel day. 

I guess the day it started. Tomorrow is one month. 

I cannot shake the thought off us always being together one day. What that would look like. I don’t even know what my routine would look like, much less always being with him. I have a feeling I’d be more… feisty as he says. Pushing those boundaries. Always testing him. It’s fun. Especially saying no. 

So there is still a song that triggers memories of Allan. Drake Best I Ever Had... Wow was that a strong one. Won't be listening to that song anytime soon, not that I even like the song anyways. 

I love how Jay refers to his place as my home too. I think at one point he said home was wherever he was, for me. For now I still like having my own place as well as being on my own but I also hate being apart from him. I feel my need for independence slipping away from me. I like the idea of being able to rely on him. To need him and want him. I’ve never needed anyone. But I do need Jay. I don’t want to be some crazy psycho either